Dear Audy,
It’s easy to make plans. Super easy. All you have to do is state what you’re going to do. Done! Plans. Keeping to them however…that can be a bit trickier.
For a long time, I have believed that I could be coping better with my pain management. This felt a little like a pipe dream, CRPS just seemed to have so much control over me. This year, the dream has finally been pulled from the pipe and is laid in front of me, gleaming with possibilities.
I have been flaring a lot, full body with an emphasis on hands and feet.
Despite this, the only negative emotion that I have been dealing with is boredom. I haven’t felt like the pain is stealing my future and I haven’t felt like my world is going to end because I am forced into down time.
I’ve had to pull back from prorking too much this week (prork is productive work that is not actually work as it doesn’t involve getting paid. When it’s a good time, it’s funprorking). This has been alright with me as I spent the week before pouring myself into a writing project and I think I need some time to replenish my reserves.
Having completed a project during flare season is a huge achievement for me. Painbrain can be an enormous obstacle. I had to work around it, over it and through it, simply taking advantage of any helpful thoughts and moments of clearer thinking.
I found that adding something to the article every day, however small or deleted after a few minutes, was the best way to keep my head in the game. Some days I could write more than others, some days I hated every word to leave my hands, however I am pretty pleased with the finished product. Overcoming challenges to get it done is just a part of the process.
Challenges on this one have included prioritisation, which in this instance means that other personal administration and housework tasks have been pushed to the side for later processing.
I am taking it easy today, recovering from the sugar and alcohol of Australia Day and hanging out with all my onscreen buddies.
Sure, I wish that every little thing didn’t have to cause so much physical pain, but I’m also pleased as happy punch (punch has feelings too) that I’m not putting myself through the psychological blender instead of accepting things and getting on with what I can do.
I think I might just stay a while and sip a cup of tea.
Love & Coping Fairies,
Caf
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I love this! “It’s no less physically painful than before, but it’s plenty more peaceful here in this current part of my chronic pain journey.
I am doing my best to be there too. Stress is such a killer.
Thanks, Della! After I wrote this one, the pain decided to increase itself. It was so far off my regular spectrum that I was rating it 15/10…it should have been impossible, LOL! Thankfully I am doing a little bit better today, taking it easy and sticking to my plan of stepping up the pain management again. Sending hugs to you! xx
Oh, dear girl, I’m so sorry your pain has been so bad!! I hope you keep improving!! Breath deep. Stress management is pain management.
Gentle hugs!
Thank you! I am plodding along, focusing more on pacing my days and doing Feldenkrais. I had been quite slack with all the feeling well but getting back into it, I am amazed again at how much it helps. Not long ’til the end of Summer and then hopefully life will be easier again. Big hugs to you! xox
I totally understand what you mean by this. It’s as though your caught in the eye of a hurricane. There is calmness in the eye but on the outside the storm is still going on. I’m so happy that your finding things that are keeping your head in the game.
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